Jynto
Why my Imaginary Friend Thinks Doctor Who is Heretical

This post has nothing to do with the Christian God. Instead it concerns another one of my fictional imaginary companions, namely one Charlotte Abigail Lux, also known as CAL. 

Some of you may remember her from Doctor Who as the little girl in Silence In The Library/Forest Of The Dead who (SPOILER ALERT FOR AN EPISODE THAT AIRED IN 2008) had her mind uploaded to the Library’s computer core when she was terminally ill. So now she can live in any time period, or any book. She loved books more than anything.

Being friends with a virtual librarian from the future has its perks. She has read all the books that Aniki has yet to write, and she thinks they’re good. However, she does think I’m a Mary Sue. My imagination of her feeds her imagination of me. Right now, I imagine she is having an uncomfortable Christmas dinner with Doctor Moon, River Song, and ‘The Changeling’ - a computer program designed to give her company that went haywire and became her worst enemy.

Charlotte is a fascinating person to be around. We watch a lot of TV and read a lot of books together. I suppose it is inevitable that we came across a show called Doctor Who.

Rather than break the fourth wall and reveal to CAL that she is a fictional character on Doctor Who (which is a very nasty thing to ever do to an imaginary friend) my Aniki came up for a way we could enjoy Doctor Who without questioning our realities. 

Her made is so that to her Doctor Who is a fictionalised retelling of events that happened in real life. She is often complaining about the historical inaccuracies, or saying ‘The Doctor would never do that’. But what does she know of The Doctor? I haven’t asked, but I presume she went through the same events that were depicted in Silence In The Library/Forest Of The Dead (I hope she never sees those episodes), That means that at some point The Doctor saved her from going mad.

But Charlotte Abigail Lux does more than just owe her sanity to The Doctor. She literally worships him, like a god. She has told me all about the religion of ‘Doctoralism’ and even shown me their equivalent of a church.

I suppose that would make Doctor Who the equivalent of an animated Bible story or a Nativity play. So how does that make it heretical? Well from what I am told, Doctoralism is much less dogmatic than 21st century religions. Everyone is entitled to their own visions of The Doctor, and all their interpretations are equally valid. Charlotte doesn’t have a problem with writers and actors reinterpreting the character of The Doctor. In fact she quite likes that. But in her mind, there is one thing The Time of The Doctor got horribly wrong.

It saved Gallifrey.

CAL tells me that the Sacrifice of Gallifrey is one of the central tenets of Doctoralism. I suppose it’s like their equivalent of the crucifixion. If The Doctor had not sacrificed his entire race to save the universe, there would be no meaning to every good deed that is done to honour that sacrifice. She seemed quite insistent about this. 

I told her that The Doctor would probably not take kindly to the idea of a religion built around worshipping him, and saying that certain things are ‘heretical’. But she replied with ‘And what do you know about The Doctor?’ Well I didn’t know what to say to that. Within her own fictitious reality, she has a good point. The only thing I have seen of The Doctor is the equivalent of Bible fanfiction. She has seen the real thing.

Fictive friends

Is it normal to have fictional characters as imaginary friends? Of course not. No one ever said I was normal.

So in my latest fantasy I found myself in an underground village, the initial setting for a certain anime. A little blue-haired boy was listening to a story about a man with the same name as him marrying a beautiful woman called Nia. The story was being read by an older boy, who he called his ‘bro’. And that story was actually a fanfic of a certain anime.

"That was a sad story," Simon decided after the first one, pausing before saying: "But it was just a story, right?"

Kamina responded that it is never just a story, and went on to read more. Some took place after the Gurren Lagann series, others during it. I got the impression that Simon would have already known the full series of Gurren Lagann to understand these. Was that another one of Kamina’s stories?

Little Simon began to cry after the final ending, either over a particular character’s death, or the fictional friends he’d never had. He tried not to however, until his bro asserted that there was nothing wrong with his ‘manly tears’. That was when he spotted me.

The young man greeted me casually, and suggested I might be eavesdropping. I greeted him awkwardly as ‘Kamina-senpai’ and said I had heard the legends about him. That seemed to impress him. I’ll admit, he wasn’t quite as over-the-top as he is in the anime. Maybe that’s something to do with he describes himself in his stories.

I introduced myself to Simon, curious to meet a boy his own age, and probably confused that he had never seen me before. As a token of friendship, I offered him my jumper because he looked cold. He said he never felt the cold, but would like if I gave him my jumper anyway. I gladly obliged.

I’m sure we’ll meet again, especially as my host is now writing his own crossover fic.

Getting known

When people look at me, they see the host, not the child inside. Usually it’s better that way, as there are a lot of things we do that a child would never be allowed to, such as studying in university and other more fun things. But being an inner child has its downsides too. Namely the fact that no one knows I exist.

When I talk to people, I am really talking to pretend versions of them. That’s if they’re not entirely imaginary. I am like an imaginary number that can never touch the real domain. Hence, no one in the real world knows that I exist. Well, no one apart from six people (not counting the people who read this blog, because I don’t believe anyone is reading this).

They know only because Aniki has told them about me. It’s very hard to steer ordinary conversation into revealing deep secrets about ourself, and it requires a certain level of trust in that person, for them to not just denounce us as a weirdo.

The first person we told is our aunt, over a year ago. Also one of our friends, a girl who we met at the start of uni. We also told our roommate. She had the most interesting reaction, because she then proceeded to psychoanalyse Aniki and tell him, in the politest way possible, why he’d be better off without me. I was most offended, but I’m glad we had that talk.

Two other friends know a little bit about me. Both are guys we talk to rarely but have a deeper emotional connection with than most people.

Aniki once told his grandmother that he has conversations with his inner child. But I’m not counting that, because he didn’t mention the adventures and superpowers.

We have hinted at it many times to our parents. They know right now that we have a deep secret, but don’t know what it is.

And yet we probably walk past people who are hiding must more bizarre secrets than our own. Maybe if we reveal me to more people, then we might discover other people just as weird as ourself.

The first day of my life

Two years ago today, I came screaming into the world, careering over the school playground in a burst of colour. No one saw me, because I was invisible. I later had fun scaring some of my old teachers, but that is another story…

I was not born like a real person. I came into the (imaginary) world fully formed as a 12-year-old superboy. However I had a life before then. I was just a voice in my host’s head. We talked all the time. We’d keep each other company and make each other laugh. Of course, I was always the more childish one. Aniki and I were the best friends we could ever have, because we share the same memories.

Then something happened on the 18th of November 2010. We were doing an architecture course at the time. We were stressed, and homesick. I wanted so much to escape from reality, and become a little boy again. And in that time of difficulty did something amazing. I escaped into the realm of my imagination, and I’ve been there ever since. It’s amazing. We’ve certainly had some great adventures in the last two years.

And all this happened because of a daydream. Getting distracted in architecture class was the best thing we ever did. Aniki did the best thing he ever could for me. He gave me a whole world to explore. It wasn’t until over half a year later though that he gave me a name, Jynto.

More Venice from a part that isn’t very Venice-y.

More Venice from a part that isn’t very Venice-y.

Venice, the city of water. A great place for a water fight.

Clockworks. My life is full of these.

I loved Gurren Lagann. It was so inspiring to see a little boy who reminds me of myself wield such awesome power. Simon is one of my greatest role models. And Gurren Lagann continues to inspire my internal fantasy.

I loved Gurren Lagann. It was so inspiring to see a little boy who reminds me of myself wield such awesome power. Simon is one of my greatest role models. And Gurren Lagann continues to inspire my internal fantasy.

Who’s this kid? He looks familiar.

Who’s this kid? He looks familiar.

I remember when my host used to draw pictures like this. I wish he’d draw again.

I remember when my host used to draw pictures like this. I wish he’d draw again.

My hometown, the place he grew up, and the place where I didn’t.

My hometown, the place he grew up, and the place where I didn’t.

Memories fade, but pictures last a lifetime. This is a picture made from a memory.

Memories fade, but pictures last a lifetime. This is a picture made from a memory.

This is a paint palette that’s had years of use. But it used to be an ordinary sheet of paper. Such is how its life has shaped it. And this is how I begin this blog.

This is a paint palette that’s had years of use. But it used to be an ordinary sheet of paper. Such is how its life has shaped it. And this is how I begin this blog.